=|=
It's not the best of the streets, it's not the worst of streets. It's very much just a street.
(if: $BarryAlleyTrigger is true)[
You notice a familiar shape lurking just out of view flicking his wispy tail.
]
A man in large sunglasses and boat shoes peers at you from the top of a newspaper. You let out an audible sigh at how bad the man is at being inconspicuous.
An alleyway is to your left. Neon signs glow from just beyond your view. The suspicious man's eyes seem to always find their way back to said alley. Is he waiting on someone?
(if: $BarryAlleyTrigger is true)[<br>
[[Pet cat]]
]\
[[Talk to obvious fed]]
[[Head into alleyway]]
=|=
(if: $BarryAlleyTrigger is true)[
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/efYDOjP.gif" width="450" height="580" />
]
(else: )[
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/tV249p5.gif" width="450" height="580" /></iframe>]
|==|=|=
Drew can't leave the apartment because he's vain and "can't even."
It's up to you takes this investigation to main street.
No, literally, we have to check outside now.
[[Go to street level? -> Street]]
[[Actually, I'm fickle, I need to look around some more->Apartment scene]]
[[Go to sleep?->Ending 1]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/QdsZ0tp.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|They accept your apology.
After a polite exchange the vampires agree to help you out.
[[Continue|ending 3]]=|=
You emerge into the living room. Drew looks like he's playing charades in front of the full length wall mirror.
Yup, no shadow to be found.
This does not bode well... for your sleep.
Your eyes dart across the room for clues:
Your prized espresso machine glistens in the morning sun in the kitchen. The counter is strewn about with the ingredients of last night's pasta dish. A cat (looking even more annoyed than you are) is stretching on the windowsill above the couch, doing his best to ignore Drew's shrill outbursts.
An singular, ominous note hangs gingerly from a fridge magnet. It reads:
"B a g e l s"
{
(if:($caffeine >0))[ [[make coffee again?|make coffee]] ]
(else:) [ <br> [[make coffee]] ]
(unless:(visited:"take garlic"))[ <br>[[take garlic]] ]
(unless:(visited:"Barry's affection"))[ <br>[[pet cat]] ]\
<br>[[Eh, I'm done here->A Whole new World]]
}
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/HZHeJOO.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|"We can't hear you!", the crowd shout back.
Totally ruining the chance to seem actually confident , you--
[[Introduce yourself as the MC for trivia night, You might be able to get answers to your question indirectly|C]]=|=
This was the right decision.
I have a feeling we'll be seeing him again.
(set: $BarryAlleyTrigger to true)
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/zltDIa9.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|A single vampire emerges from the crowd.
He seems important? You don't really know much about vampires so you go with it.
"Actually, I'm the MC for trivia night. In fact...I just got done selecting the questions regarding bagels for tonight."
Bagels? Nope, no time to linger on that, your attention returns to the immediate problem.
You feel like a bad person for lying.
You apologize.
However.
Mid-apology, you realize you *are* a bad person, and could take this opportunity to surprise attack.
(if:$garlic is true)[
[[Use garlic->Ending 2]]
]
(if:$holywater is true)[
[[Use Holy water->Ending 2]]
]
(if:$Barry is true) [
[[ Use Barry|Secret Ending]]
]
[[Actually, continue apologizing and resist your horrible nature]]He seems genuinely shocked to be outed.
"Only a vampire would see through my ruse!"
"**Take this, Vile Creature**"
He pulls out what looks like the cross word section and hold it up like
...well, a cross.
Is this guy serious?
[[Continue?]]
[[Walk away awkwardly-> Street]]A vampire's one true weakness, CROSS word puzzles.
Of course!
The priest asks for your help solving the cross word puzzle to prove you're not
a vampire.
[[fill in only wrong answers|wrong answer]]
[[fill in only right answers|right answer]]
[[fill in half and half|wrong answer]]It's kinda spooky down here.
This far down the alley feels devoid of light.
It's like lunchtime though?
It would be a perfect place for...
[[Vampires, but of course!]]
[[A nap!->Ending 1]]"What'll ya have?" The bartender asks
You ponder at what kinds of beverages a vampire would order.
"BluuuuUUUuuuu... d?"
The bartender frowns and hands you a glass bottle.
"What are you, dense? I know you're already drunk from the way yer talkin' but maybe call it by the brand name next time. You never know whose listening!"
You look down at the drink in front of you, quickly scanning for the label.
"Red Stuff"
Ah, should've known.
The bottle is dark, concealing its contents well.
The not so mystery liquid swirls within, waiting for your inevitable imbibing.
(if: $caffeine is 0)[ [[Drink the bottle.|Drunk]] ](else:)[ [[Drink the bottle.|Not Drunk]] ]You're a lightweight and even fake beer that's actually blood makes you fall asleep.
[[Continue->Ending 1]]Ending 1
You fell asleep.
(if: $caffeine is 4)[
You drank so much caffeine that you crashed your system. Bummer.
]
Maybe Drew is better off without a reflection anyways.
[[Try again?->start]]
[[Nope->Main menu]]Ending 2-- Bad puns of shame.
Your actions do nothing except annoy the vampires. Lucky for you, they are actually really understanding about the whole ordeal and just ask you to leave.
You definitely can't get Drew's reflection back now and will have a hard time sleeping through his fits of existential dread.
Maybe you are a bad person and should take a long hard look in the...
[[Continue->Main menu]]=|=
You immediately regret your decision.
This is **definitely** a vampire bar.
Imagine the most vampire bar you can imagine with your... imagination.
Everyone is a spooky vampire without a shred of doubt.
Also, **everyone is looking at you**.
What do?
(unless: (visited:"Drink"))[
[[Play it cool and buy a drink, no one can tell your not a vampire|Drink]]
]
[[Meekly ask for help regarding your friend's situation.|B]]
[[Introduce yourself as the MC for trivia night, You might be able to get answers to your question indirectly|C]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/S65NyrH.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|Why would you do that?
**Barry is offended**
[[Continue-> Street]]=|=
There's no going back now.
No particular reason, you just lack the motivation to retrace your own steps anymore.
[[Continue deeper into the alleyway?|Dark alleyway]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/q6E6Vkf.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|Mirror, mirror
[[start]]
[[about]]You start to consider that the nice people who run Totally Not a Vampire Bar might have selected the name to make light of their unfortunate location deep in the dark recesses of this alley way.
That its actually a completely normal bar and theres nothing to be scared of whatsoever.
[[Filled with guilt over your judgemental nature, you enter Totally Not a Vampire Bar->Enter Bar]]Really?
[[Enter Totally Not a Vampire Bar->Enter Bar]]
[[Nah fam, seriously, I'm good on this one]]It's just blood. Tastes like old pennies. Possibly more refined than new pennies.
You wouldn't know.
[[Continue->Enter Bar]]=|=
His purrs grow louder. Barry really is the best.
your mind wanders to simpler, quieter times.
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
[[Pet him again?]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/zltDIa9.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|Barry climbed down the fire escape, he does this from time to time to harass the street vendors for food. You give him happy pets and a scratch under his chin for good measure.
(set: $BarryAlleyTrigger to false)
[[Take him back to the apartment?->Apartment scene]]
[[Carry him in a baby sling for the rest of your adventure?|Take Barry]]
[[Return to street -> Street]]=|=
You feel remiss as you acknowledge how Barry never gets this much attention these days. He gives you a look that can't be mistaken, his orange eyes like big glistening pumpkins, bore holes right through you. Lovingly, of course. He thinks you're the best human ever.
And he wouldn't be wrong.
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
[[In the words of Dj Khaled: Another one?->Barry's affection]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/zltDIa9.gif" width="450" height="580" />>
|==|=|=
Secret Ending -- Forget about it.
The vampires immediately recognize your companion as none other than their long lost king, Barrius XIV of Meowthia.
You spend the rest of your days in service to the vampire court of the King.
Decades later, huddled around a fire with your fellow blood knights, you take turns trading origin stories. You know, knight stuff.
Reflecting on the beginning of your jouney you have a thought.
**Why does the name Drew sound familiar?**
It also occurs to you that none of you speak "cat", sparking serious questions regarding why or how you're doing any of this.
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/7zFpAll.gif" width="450" height="580" />
[[Continue->Main menu]]
|==|Barry doesn't protest. You think it strange at first, but it makes sense, he's seen the hangover a million times. Besides, he may come in handy.
(set: $Barry to true)
[[Return to street-> Street]]Your assumptions about the man were correct, but not entirely accurate.
It's an undercover catholic priest who really needs to work on his disguise.
The iconic collar sticks out pretty sorely amidst the rest of the get-up.
[[Call him out on his disguise?]]
[[Leave him be-> Street]]
(if: $Barry is true)[
[[Hand him Barry?]]
]=|=
It seem so farfetched, but with the whole reflection situation...
...and fatefully placed anti-vampire accoutrements...
...and undercover priests...
it really **IS** the most obvious answer.
You begin to re-examine the alleyway with new eyes, the eyes of
someone paranoid of vampires that is.
you notice something peculiar, a bar at the far end of the alley with a flicking neon sign above the door: "TNVB" .
this obviously stands for **Totally Not a Vampire Bar**!
[[Enter Totally Not a Vampire Bar?->Enter Bar]]
[[Nah, I'm good]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/gY3KWRr.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|Made by me and stuff.
If you like this check out Shadows over Loathing for more.
[[Return to menu->Main menu]]ending 3
Turns out that Drew actually let the vampires bite him in return for rent money.
Typical Drew.
You offer to cover the difference by volunteering as an actual unpaid MC for trivia nights
for the next 2 weeks. In return, the vampires return Drew to his usual, reflective nature.
You never realized how important trivia was to vampires, but, given the absence of crossword puzzles in their life, I guess it's equally as entertaining?
You are now free to go back to sleep. After tonight's trivia night shift though, of course.
[[Continue ->Main menu]]=|=
Yup. You did it. You made coffee.
(set: $caffeine to $caffeine +1)
(if: $caffeine is 4)[
(goto: "Ending 1")
]
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/vv3yEvM.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|=|=
Barry is sitting in the window, posed elgantly in the golden rays of light. You pet him. He purrs.
And just like that, all is right in the universe.
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
[[Pet Barry again?]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/zltDIa9.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|=|=
"Oh my, clumsy me. I mistook you for one of those **Nosferatu**."
You're 60% certain this man is insane. Nice, round number.
"You can never be too careful in these dark times. Especially since CROSS word puzzles are so scarce these days. Here, take this my child, for your health."
**The priest hands you a bottle of holy water**
It smells like tequila?
Hmmm.
(set:$holywater to true)
[[You don't ask questions->Head into alleyway]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/vfqYk8r.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|You are fast asleep in your comfy bed.
It is an exceptionally sleepy day.
but alas, your beauty sleep is interrupted by your room mate, Drew, throwing a fit.
Something about having lost his reflection?
You let out an audible groan as you weigh your options.
Should you investigate?
[[continue|Apartment scene]]
[[go back to sleep-->Ending 1]]
(set: $garlic to false)
(set: $holywater to false)
(set: $BarryAlleyTrigger to false)
(set: $Barry to false)
(set: $caffeine to 0)=|=
You pick up a clove of garlic from the teakwood cutting board.
After all, we all see where this is going.
(set:$garlic to true)
[[Continue->Apartment scene]]
=|=
<img src="https://i.imgur.com/IFj16RQ.gif" width="450" height="580" />
|==|Not quite.
the man tries to quiz your knowledge of words more, but you dash into the alley to lose him.
[[Whew, Close one ->Head into alleyway]]